An Introvert's Tale

What I am going to say today can be related by almost every introvert and almost all of us have a friend in our clique who is an introvert but wait, am I being paranoid? I always want to keep myself away from people, though my emotional void for presence of those who I want needs to be filled, I always try to skip the quick touch whenever it is involved and get into a conversation as soon as possible. I’ve always hated a quickly ended conversation because it doesn’t allow me to connect to someone and also there are reasons they end soon after they start. The most common reason? I run out of topics to talk, I rely on the latter to be the one who drives the conversation but not everyone sees this the same way as I do. People think I talk less because I am shy, damn I am, I have always had problems connecting with people because of which there are only few friends that I’ve, but once I connect with them, there’s always an attachment involved, few of which have gifted me with a lot of sleepless nights and taught me to look at the world with a larger perspective.

I am not going to lie, I have a very rigid mindset and I’ve abstained myself from getting into environments and people that force me to change the way I am, only one person has ever been able to challenge me enough to push me out of my comfort zone and helped me define myself in a new way.

I, who was shy and introvert till 12^th transcended into being an ambivert only after few months of stepping into college, knowing no one there I had to start from scratch and make new friends. Whoa! That was hard for me but soon those people filled the void that I always carried with myself. Trips, Treks and Tours with those people made the best part of life I had till now. Fast forward into the last year of bachelors’ degree, I made few newer friends, one of which is someone who I had never imagined would gain so much importance in my life, someone who called me a best friend, hadn’t had heard that word from anyone for me for few years now and here we are now sharing everything with one another; useless talks, problems, solutions, gossips and many more things. That’s what an introvert really needs, someone they can talk to, someone who trusts them, someone who they always want to care about, someone who will create a new kind of void and can only be filled by that same person.

Over the years I have made many decisions, some that I am proud of and some that make me feel sorry about myself but every of those decisions are connected and make me who I am. An introvert doesn’t want lot of people in their life, only a bunch that can be counted on fingers, but once the introvert connects to them, the introvert makes sure that those people receive the best of everything he/she can offer. Know that introverts are fiercely loyal when they trust someone and they expect the same in return. Always understand that introverts don’t let many people in, so you must be pretty important to them if he/she is willing to spend their time with you.

Pen & Life

Have you ever imagined if there was this one instance that had never happened in your life? Your life would have been completely different and maybe better. Of course, if you do, you would be fixating up on your past and letting it torment your present.

But what if the events had turned out the way you wanted? Are you sure things would have been anymore different? Even if they had turned out the way you wanted, would things have been better than they currently are?

Let’s pull an analogy between a pen and our life, a pen can be used to write whatever we want, but the things we write are always driven by our emotions and our needs to fulfil our ideas, just like that our life can be used to do whatever we want but we are also driven by our emotions, needs and wants.